You are viewing [info]solidsnark's journal

About this Journal
Current Month
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30
Nov. 20th, 2008 @ 04:45 pm Chili Recipe
Someone asked for this recently so I figured I'd type it up.

Snark's Chili

Ingredients:

  • 3 tbsp vegetable oil

  • 1 lb lean ground beef

  • 1 lb steak (Preferably top sirloin but chuck works too), cut in 1/3 inch dice

  • 2 medium onions, chopped

  • 1 green bell pepper, seeded and chopped

  • 5 cloves garlic (pressed or minced)

  • 1/4 cup tomato paste

  • 5 jalapeno peppers, stemmed, seeded and minced

  • 2 bay leaves

  • 5 tbsp chili powder (Preferably Penzey's)

  • 1 tsp salt

  • 1 tsp ground cumin

  • 1 tsp oregano

  • 1/2 tsp black pepper

  • 2 cans (14 1/2 oz) diced tomatoes (preferably Muir Glen fire roasted), un-drained

  • 1 can beer

  • 1 can (14 oz) beef broth

  • 2 cans (4 oz) diced green chilies, un-drained

  • 4 tbsp Sriracha sauce

  • 2 tbsp Tabasco sauce

  • 2 tbsp Cholula sauce



Heat 1 tbsp of the oil in a large pot over medium-high heat. Brown diced meat in oil, don't stir too frequently to get a good browning. Move meat and drippings to a large bowl. Brown ground beef, breaking it up into small chunks. Move meat and drippings to the meat bowl.

Heat the other 2 tbsp oil over medium heat. Add onion, green pepper and garlic. Stir until vegetables are tender.

Add tomato paste, jalapenos, bay leaves, chili powder, salt, cumin and black pepper to the pot. Add tomatoes to the pot, squishing them as you add them. (If you like less chunky chili. I do!) Add beer, meat, broth and green chilies. Bring to a boil. Add hot sauce. Reduce heat and simmer, partially covered for 2 hours or until meat is very tender.

I usually make this in double or triple batches and freeze the leftovers. Without beans it freezes really well. If possible let sit in the fridge overnight for the flavors to blend before serving.

When serving, it's always tasty to add toppings like:


  • Sour cream

  • Shredded cheddar cheese (Sharp)

  • Chopped onions or Jalapenos

  • Sliced green onions

About this Entry
Angry Cat
Nov. 6th, 2008 @ 08:08 pm Dude, where the FUCK is my car!?!
For a carless friend:


My car is dead.
It makes me sad...
It's been too long!
I'm going mad!

The walls I fear
are closing in!
I feel the dust
upon my skin!

I'm stuck inside!
Nowhere to go!
My life is truly
full of woe!

No one will call!
Nowhere to go!
I miss everyone
I know!

I need a drink!
(Not from the sink)
I'd hit the bar
If I had my car

Whiskey! Bourbon!
Scotch or Rye!
I'm so damn parched
I fear I'll die!

(I'd even drink
some nasty beer
But there isn't
any here!)


I need my wheels!
To ride! To drive!
It's been too long!
I won't survive!

So fix it! Fix it!
1! 2! 3!
Or else! Or else!
Or so help me...

I'll break your ribs
Tear off your arm!
And other grievous
bodily harm!

I'll gouge your eyes
And break your face
(It'd help your looks
you big disgrace!)

I'll rip off your head
and make you dead!
Shit down your neck!
So what the heck!?!

Grab your tools!
Roll up your sleeves!
Get off your ass
and get to work!
Go fix my car
you fucking jerk!!!!!

Until you do
I'm stuck in here.
Unless of course
I hitch a ride
(After swallowing
my pride)


So I'm asking nicely!
Please! Please! Please!

...what do you mean
you lost my keys...?

>.<
About this Entry
Angry Cat
Nov. 1st, 2008 @ 08:06 pm (no subject)
So yesterday was Halloween again.

I decided to punt the costume and participating again this year. (As usual) Instead I went out to pick up a pizza.

This was a mistake.

I was told it would take 20 minutes so cheerfully I set off to pick up the tasty 'za.

When I got to the store there must have been 40 people milling about the place waiting for their food. This did not only bode ill, it boded with malice and forethought.

So with great reluctance I joined the herd. There were great times to be had discussing whether we were a line or just a mob. You could tell it's an election year from the crowd byplay. The red sheep (following the herd metaphor) wanted a line, with themselves in the lead. (Apparently they were unaware of the inherent danger of being a sheep in FRONT.) The blue sheep wanted to mill about communaly.

As I am not naturally a herd animal and spent far too much time watching Foghorn Leghorn as a child I stood around and wondered how I could turn the red and blue sheep against each other. It would at least make the time pass faster.

10 minutes later I was bored again.

The man benhind me quickly got on my nerves as he mumbled into his cell phone. He reminded me of Angel from Buffy. Not only did he look like him, he had the same angsty whining thing going on. His monotonal conversation was a joy to endure...

"Can I tell Marageret what you told me earlier?

(Pause)

Only I thought she should know.

(Pause)

I didn't want to tell her without asking you first though.

(Pause)

So it's Ok if I tell her? You know, what you said this morning?

(Pause)

So I can tell her?

(Pause)

Only I thought she should know."

This shit went on for a good half hour. By now the pizza was 45 minutes late. I was no longer wondering if I would make it back for Halloween, I'd given that up. I was beginning to worry about not getting to vote on Tues.

Another 20 minutes went by. Pizza's were NOT flying out of the store which made us all wonder if there was anyone actually working.

Without words the crowd realized that food was not coming and that alternate steps would need to be taken if the strong were to survive. There is a reason our teeth are pointy and it was not long before we'd need to take that ultimate step to insure that we'd come home alive, but tainted, to our families. By common assent cell phone boy was selected to be first on the menu.

It was at this point after an hour and a half after the pizza was LATE that my name was called. Leaving cellphone boy to his grisly fate I was able to fight my way past the old ladies at the counter to get my fucking medium with pepperoni.

I took the opportunity at the counter to ask the manager if the person on the phone had a vague clue as to the difference between 20 minutes and nearly two hours. The blank look on the drones face was all the answer I needed. Clearly the pizza business doesn't require the best and brightest.

Kicking children to the side I fled with my admittedly tasty food which I was able to eat in less than 5% of the time I waited for it.

I fucking hate Halloween.
About this Entry
Angry Cat
Feb. 20th, 2008 @ 08:16 am Bulkogi
Tags:
I've seen bulkogi served at local korean restaurants as sliced beef and as short ribs. I used sliced beef when I made it and the results were WONDERFUL. It takes a while to marinate, but the marinade makes it wonderfully tender. Very easy to make and absolutely delicious.

Bulkogi

Ingredients:

  • 3 lbs beef steak (Cheap is ok. I used "eye of round" steak)



Marinade Ingredients:

  • 2 tbsp sesame seeds

  • 4 large cloves garlic

  • 1 cup soy sauce

  • 2 tbsp mirin (or substitute sherry)

  • 3 tbsp sugar

  • 2 tbsp sesame oil

  • 2 tbsp water

  • 2 tsp fresh ginger, finely grated

  • 1/2 cup chopped green onions (green and white parts mixed)



First, make the marinade. Toast the sesame seeds over low heat until they are golden brown, stirring frequently. Using a pepper or spice grinder, finely grind the sesame seeds. Mix all of the marinade ingredients, add to a large zip-lock bag and put the meat in to marinate. Let it marinate for a good long time. (12-24 hours)

Remove the beef from the bag, reserving the marinade. Thinly slice the beef, the thinner the better. Then working in small batches, cook the beef over medium high heat in a wok with a little oil. As each batch begins to brown add a few tablespoons of the marinade and then finish them off.

Serve with rice.
About this Entry
Angry Cat
Sep. 5th, 2007 @ 09:37 am (no subject)
Current Mood: amusedamused
An odd idea for a movie occurred to me today. When discussing random politics the phrase "Jefferson must be spinning in his grave" came up and it struck a chord with me.

The dead coming back for vengeance is an old theme but it would be VERY fun to see the founding fathers coming back as pissed off zombies to tear apart congress and chance the president around the Whitehouse. I'm just not sure what to call it. "Take my Liberty and I'll give you Death" is all that leaps to mind and it sucks.

The political zombie film must be written. There is plenty of room for fun commentary on the current political state and I really want to see zombies stampeding in Washington DC.

The only thing I can be sure of is they're eating politicians they won't be crying for "Brains!"
About this Entry
Angry Cat
Apr. 12th, 2007 @ 08:32 am Pulled Pork... Mmmm...
Tags:
I've been playing with making pulled pork at home over the past few months and finally have it refined to the point where it's worth typing up. I'm very happy with the results and it's easy to make, but a very long process. It will probably take 24 hours to finish so I usually start it cooking right before I go to bed on a friday or saturday.

Because of the way my house is constructed, I don't dare trying to put wood chips in the oven to smoke it while cooking. Smoke rises to the highest point in my house and there's a fire detector up there. All well and good. But once smoke gets there it will NOT dissipate for a half hour or so. And as all of the fire alarms are linked and connected to house power, the din is incredible and is not easily shut off. Because of this I use liquid smoke in the mopping liquid. It works wonderfully with no risk of having my eardrums rupture.

When I make pulled pork I usually make a LOT due to the total cooking time. I wait until I see pork roasts on sale and buy 2 big ones. It freezes wonderfully so it's a good investment.

Snark's Pulled Pork

Ingredients:

  • 2 pork shoulder roasts 4-5 lbs each (I use boston blade)

  • Yellow mustard (Cheap generic stuff works great)



Dry Rub Ingredients:

  • 4 tbsp paprika

  • 2 tbsp salt

  • 1 tbsp celery salt

  • 2 tbsp black pepper, coarsely ground

  • 2 tbsp cumin

  • 2 tbsp dark brown sugar

  • 1 tbsp turbinado sugar

  • 1 tbsp dried oregano

  • 1 tbsp cayenne pepper

  • 2 tsp dried sage

  • 1 tsp dry mustard

  • 2 bay leaves



Mopping Liquid Ingredients:

  • 1 cup apple cider or juice

  • 1 cup cider vinegar

  • 1/3 cup olive oil

  • 2 tbsp liquid smoke (optional)



Start out by making the dry rub. Grind or crush the bay leaves and mix all of the ingredients together.

Trim the external fat off the roasts. If this is not done, the rub will not stick to the finished product which would be a shame as it makes a wonderfully tasty "bark" that adds considerable flavor to the meat. Once the roasts are trimmed, slather them with the mustard. This will not add flavor, but it will enable the rub to stick.

Firmly press the rub onto the roasts, covering them. This should completely hide the yellow mustard in the end, giving the roasts a dry appearance. At this point you can begin to cook the roasts, or you can wrap them tightly in plastic wrap and refrigerate overnight to allow the flavors to mingle. If you choose to let them rest overnight, allow them to warm to room temperature before cooking.

Set the oven to 225 degrees and put the roasts in on a roasting pan, uncovered. Leave it completely alone for about 3 hours. (This is why I usually start it at night, the 3 hour gap is the longest period it will cook unattended. You'll have to get up less if you do it this way.)

Mix the ingredients for the mopping liquid and when it comes time to check on the meat, apply the liquid to the surface of the meat to moisten it. I usually use a basting brush, but a spray bottle would work too. Be careful doing this the first time because if you're not you will wash the rub off.

At this point you'll want to apply some liquid every 1 1/2 - 2 hours. The meat will be done when it's internal temperature hits 203. The meat will take approximately 2 1/2 hours per pound. When the internal temperature hits 185 or so I usually increase the oven temperature to 240 to hurry it up a bit.

Once the meat is done cooking, remove it from the oven and allow it to cool to the point that it can be handled. Using forks and fingers, pull the meat apart into strands, discarding any bone or remaining fat. Try to keep the bits of "bark" attached to the meat. It's tasty.

At this point you should have 4-5 pounds of pulled pork to make sandwiches with or use in another way. Freeze any that you will not immediately use.
About this Entry
Angry Cat
Mar. 21st, 2007 @ 12:13 pm Kung Pao Chicken
Tags:
It's been a while since I've blogged anything so I'll start slow.

I made Kung Pao chicken over the weekend (Twice) and was surprised at how easy and tasty it was. I combined two different recipes to make the one presented here. It's stir fried instead of deep fried because it's tastier that way IMO.

Kung Pao Chicken


  • 3 boneless chicken breasts

  • 4 tbsp oil for stir frying

  • 6 to 8 small dried red chili peppers

  • 3 garlic cloves

  • 2/3 cup skinless, unsalted peanuts

  • chili oil (Optional)


Marinade:

  • 1 1/2 tbsp Soy Sauce

  • 1 1/2 tsp chinese rice wine

  • 3 tsp cold water

  • 3 tsp cornstarch


Sauce:

  • 2 tbsp dark soy sauce

  • 4 tsp light soy sauce

  • 2 tbsp red wine vinegar

  • 2 tbsp chicken broth or water

  • 2 tbsp granulated sugar

  • 1/2 tsp salt

  • a few drops sesame oil

  • 2 tsp cornstarch



Cut the chicken up into 3/4" cubes and place them in a bowl. Add the marinade ingredients and stir well. Allow the chicken to marinate for 30 minutes.

Meanwhile, mix the sauce ingredients, whisking the cornstarch in last.

When it's done marinating, stir fry the chicken in 2 tbsp of oil until it is cooked, then remove it from the wok. Add 2 tbsp of oil and stir fry the chiles for a minute or two. Using a garlic press, add the garlic to the pan and stir fry until fragrant. (Approximate 30 seconds) If you prefer a spicier dish, a dash of chili oil at this point will hit the spot.

Give the sauce a quick stir and add it to the wok and bring it to a boil. Once it's boiling put the chicken back into the wok and add the peanuts. Stir to coat and you're all done.
About this Entry
Angry Cat
Jan. 2nd, 2007 @ 12:00 pm Fudge!
Tags:
I had never made fudge before, but I came across a recipe and gave it a shot over Christmas. It was easier than I had thought it would be and absolutely delicious.

Fudge


  • 3 cups sugar

  • 3/4 cup unsalted butter (1 1/2 sticks)

  • 2/3 cup evaporated milk

  • 1 lb semi-sweet chocolate (Chips or block chocolate chopped up)

  • 7 oz. jar marshmallow cream

  • 1 tsp. vanilla extract

  • 1 cup chopped walnuts (Optional)



Prepare everything in advance and have it ready to go in. Chop the chocolate and nuts if necessary. Get the marshmallow cream out of the jar and into a bowl that you can scrape out with a rubber spatula. (This stuff is stick and hard to work with.) Line a 13"x9"x2" baking pan with waxed paper.

In a 3-quart, thick-bottomed saucepan, bring the sugar, butter, and milk to a rolling boil on medium heat, stirring constantly once it begins to bubble. Remove the mixture from the heat once it reaches 234°F on a candy thermometer, which should take about 4 minutes. If you don't have a candy thermometer, go with four minutes.

Remove from heat. Quickly stir in chocolate and marshmallow cream. (It might be easier keeping it on low heat while stirring in these, it thickens quickly and becomes work to stir.) Once those have melted and are well mixed, stir in the vanilla and then the walnuts.

Pour into prepared pan.

Cool to room temperature before slicing. It can be placed in the fridge to firm it up more.

Makes about 3 pounds of fudge.
About this Entry
Angry Cat
Dec. 19th, 2006 @ 04:04 pm Generic Update
Current Location: At a Computer
Current Mood: Neutral
Current Music: Muzac
Today I did stuff, and various things happened to me. For example, I woke up. I even ate some food. It was an experience.

Apparently things happened to other people as well. Just check out this link: CNN

All in all, I can certainly say that today was in fact a day.
About this Entry
Mad
Oct. 23rd, 2006 @ 04:22 pm Sci-Fi Movie Meme
Taken from [info]jaberwockynmt.

Sci-Fi Movie Meme )
About this Entry
Angry Cat